Do you ever wonder what it is like to move around a lot and never feel like you have a home?
I do and I don’t.
Because moving is not a stranger to me.
Growing up in a military family and developing a love for travel has taught me a few things about what a home means.
HOME means something different to every one. People often ask me where I am from and my answer is “anywhere I am, at the moment.”
Living in Sonoma is a hard place to leave. I mean where do you go from here? We have it all. Good food, good wine, a city surrounded by vineyards, the beautiful iconic San Francisco, that is less than an hour away, and you cross the famous “Golden Gate Bridge” to get there.
Every once in a while, I get those itchy feet and need to go somewhere new, but finding a place I want to stay has become a challenge. I can never wait to get home to my own bed and pillow.
Now that I feel planted for the first time in my 50 years of existence I have put some thought into what makes a home.
Here are my discoveries.
Home is a FEELING- It is something that grabs at your emotions as you walk in the door. As I walk towards my little cottage nestled in the olive trees just off the Historic Sonoma Plaza, There is always the smell of something blooming, gardenia’s, orange blossoms, rosemary, and mint blowing in the gentle breeze. Then I step onto my porch with two white Adirondac chairs and a huge fern nestled in between them. A peace sign made from a wine barrel ( purchased here) hanging on the wall. This is where my husband and I sit on many hot evenings sharing a cool crisp glass of Rose’ (this one I love) or sometimes me champagne while he sips on his Pliny the Elder in a frozen mug. We will sit and talk for hours. The absolute best part is when I open the front door and my chocolate lab, whom I call “Kona Girl” greets me at the door with a happy tail and rubs against my legs. The love of this dog is home! That is the feeling that can be created anywhere. We have created it at the “Romaguera Cottage”. (Yes it is a location on instagram). You can visit my page @sonomarealty
Home is CREATION-This is something I have discovered everywhere I have ever lived. Creating a special place that makes you comfortable is different to everyone. To some it may be a room full of books, to others it is kitchen full of cooking utensils and smells, to another it could be a bocce ball court in the yard, to me, it is a place that is visually beautiful with the natural elements life offers us. Gardening is my happy place, planting, and creating beautiful places to relax. Which is actually hysterical if you know me. Relaxing is not generally something I am so good at. Maybe that is why I am always creating a place to do it.
Home is Love-This is easy, we are all love. Yes, that may sound hippie dippie, but we are. It is virtually impossible to have a home without love in some form. If we just open our eyes or even close them, it surrounds us.
Can you feel it?
It is that feeling you get when someone you have not seen for a long time walks in your front door. Or when the man of your dreams comes home at night. When your sister comes to visit, or that friend you adore comes over for coffee (My favorite this week) or a glass of wine. (this is a nice light summer sipper) Try it….
It is pure magic.
Home is FAMILY- This has been kind of a strange one for me. For as long as I can remember, the constant in my life has always been my children. Having a son at 16 was like growing up with a sibling and raising him at the same time. When my children were young, we moved a lot! I mean a lot. We even lived in a tent for many months. We learned that even that could be home. After driving all day, (which is a whole different blog), we would find a place we wanted to camp for the night. This by the way, was before technology, no cell phones, GPS, or computers. We were being directed by my son reading a road map. (This one is still my favorite) We would unpack the tent, Ron (12 at the time) could put it up in less than 5 minutes. Miranda who was 3 at the time, would introduce herself to all of the surrounding campers and charm them in 5 minutes. It is funny how shy she now is at 26. We would get our bedding all set up, build a fire, grab some dinner, which was generally that budding lunch meat and white bread, sit, play my guitar and sing until bed time.
Then we would talk for hours.
This is Family and Home. We made a new home in a different town every night in the same tent. It always had that familiar feeling a home has when we nestled in at night. Sometimes the place we were visiting was so fun, we would stay for several days. At the time, it was survival, now that I look back, it was not only a great adventure, but one of my fondest family memories.
Home is SPACE- Creating your own space has become one of the most important things in my life as I have gotten older. When I first moved to Hawaii, I hired a guy to drop 2 very large boulders on each side of my front lawn. One of those boulders became my thinking space. I would sit on it for hours and reflect. I remember thinking, “if I could go from being a single mom in a tent to the beautiful home over looking the Pacific Ocean in Hawaii, I could do anything”
This space on a boulder is something I often think of and look back on as the space that changed my future.
Home is REFLECTION-When you find all of the above, you reflect. As you reflect, you feel a sense of joy at your accomplishments. It is super important to stop where you are and think about the journey that got you there. Reflecting on all of the homes I have had brings back so many memories, both good and bad. Life tends to drown out the bad memories and only allow the good to shine brightly through the years. I am grateful for every house, bed, yard, tent, boat, car, hotel, coffee shop, and space that was home for a moment. Sometimes that is all we have-
Home is MEMORIES- These are the treasures we carry around like a bag of diamonds. (I like these ones) They are worth far more than anything you can purchase. If we could package good memories and sell them we would be rich. This is something only you can create for yourself. As a broke, single mom for so many years, I learned early on to create memories for myself and my kids like some people would buy Christmas presents. Now that my son is 34 and my daughter 26, I am so glad this concept was somehow implanted in my brain early on.
We often times look back and just smile.
Home is a DREAM- This is the best one!
I truly believe with every fibre of my being, that we create our own destiny based on our dreams. We all have a different dream because it is what we were meant to do.
Let me say that differently!
Our Dreams were meant to come true!
What????? It’s true. We were created with different talents, gifts, and desires, to have them happen. It’s true! I know I just said that twice, but you need to hear it again and again.
Are you dreaming of a beautiful home in the city with that special someone to share it with, Christmas dinner with your extended family in your small cottage nestled in the olive trees, a visit with a long lost friend or family member in a cabin on the lake, a moment of solitude in a villa in Tuscany looking onto vineyards, a glass of wine with the man of your dreams on a porch in Wine Country, a home in Hawaii with a big boulder in the yard looking at the Ocean watching the whales frolic in the warm ocean with their babies?
Believe it or not, you can have that Dream.
This is what I call HOME….